


the dangers of failing to label your ingredients

by marmolita



Series: FFXV tumblr ficlets [3]
Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Accidental Drug Use, Ficlet, First Time, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-13
Updated: 2018-01-13
Packaged: 2019-03-02 00:07:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13306209
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marmolita/pseuds/marmolita
Summary: Written for a combo of prompts on tumblr of drunk!noctis and promptis, cooking failure.





	the dangers of failing to label your ingredients

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: contains accidental use of drugs, but nothing bad happens because of it. Also, don't do drugs, kids, and certainly not if you expect them to behave like in this fic, because I will tell you up front I made this shit all up since I have zero experience in the matter.

"Okay," Prompto says, as Gladio gets Ignis settled in the tent, "tell me what we've got, I'm sure I can whip up something." It's really a shame that potions can't do anything about the common cold, and Ignis is so snotted up that nobody wants him messing with their food.

Noct pokes through the cooler and bags of ingredients. "Um, some dualhorn steaks and fish in here. A couple potatoes, rice, some peppers, and I think mushrooms?" He holds up a baggie with something brown inside, and Prompto squints at it.

"Yeah, looks like it. I'm not sure what kind those are."

"Dunno, all I do is pick things up, Iggy figures out what to do with them."

"Okay, well, uh, give me the mushrooms and the steaks and some peppers, and go ahead and start some rice."

Half an hour later, Prompto dishes up dinner for everyone, and Ignis crawls out of the tent to join them. "You look like shit," Noct says.

"I feel like it," Ignis replies. He eyes the plate Prompto hands him skeptically, but eats all the same.

"This isn't bad," Gladio says, and Prompto grins. It's actually pretty tasty, if he does say so himself, and even Mister Picky Prince Noctis chows down.

Everything's great! That is, until his head starts feeling kind of woozy. "I think maybe I'm coming down with Iggy's cold," Prompto says, rubbing his temple.

"Ugh, if you are, I am too." Noct groans and leans back in his chair. Ignis has already gone to bed, and Gladio is reading in the tent, so it's just the two of them. "I feel dizzy and hot."

"Yeah, me too."

There's a shuffling from inside the tent, and then Gladio pokes his head out. "The fuck did you put in that food, Prompto?"

"Huh? Nothing? I didn't put in anything that wasn't packed with our ingredients."

Gladio frowns and pulls his head back in to consult with a sleepy Ignis, then leans out again with a sigh. "Iggy says he packed some medicinal mushrooms in with the ingredients. Brown ones. Those what you put in the food?"

Prompto and Noct exchange a glance. "Yeah?"

"Shit. Guess we're in for an interesting night. I'm gonna try to sleep it off. You guys . . . " Gladio frowns at them, "don't do anything stupid. And _don't_ leave the campsite."

"You got it," Prompto says, a little shakily. He's kind of mad at himself for fucking up dinner, but it's not like Ignis had labeled the bag or anything useful like that. And if all that's going to happen is a not-so-recreational drug trip, then that's probably not so terrible, is it?

Half an hour later, and Prompto is giggling uncontrollably while Noct rolls around on the ground doing his best impression of a cat.

An hour later, Noct suddenly remembers that chairs exist and starts telling Prompto about how brilliant the invention of the chair is. Prompto nods solemnly as he slowly tips over and falls out of the one he's sitting in.

Two hours later, the sound of Ignis coughing is loud enough that Noct and Prompto grab each other in fear and end up huddling together in front of the fire, before they get distracted by how pretty the fire looks.

Two and a half hours later the huddling has turned into cuddling and Noct decides that counting Prompto's freckles is a great use of his time. "Take your clothes off," he says. "How am I supposed to count them all if I can't see them all?"

"You just want to see me naked," Prompto counters as he pulls his shirt off.

"Yeah," Noct says, "but that's not the _point_."

If Prompto was in his right mind, he would stop and think about this, but everything is blurry around the edges and Noct's face is kind of glowing and so he just says, "Fine but you have to take your clothes off too," as he takes off his pants.

Three hours later, Prompto's floating on a cloud with Noct's lips against his own and Noct's body rubbing up against his, both of them just in their underwear. Every time they pull apart, the two of them just start giggling. It's weirdly hilarious, but in a fun way, and it feels good to have Noct pressed up against him, even if Noct is kind of messy and silly.

"You're like a cat," Prompto says, when Noct laps at the hollow of his throat with short swipes of his tongue.

"Meow," Noct replies, and digs his nails in.

***

Ignis wakes up feeling better than he has in days, likely thanks to the healing mushrooms Prompto accidentally fed him the night before. He sits up and looks around, noticing that only Gladio is in the tent with him. Gladio's slumped on top of his sleeping bag, surrounded by no fewer than twenty Cup Noodles containers. Ignis frowns, then crawls out of the tent.

Noctis and Prompto are asleep tangled together in a pile of naked limbs, and Ignis stares for a moment, blinks, then sighs. He pushes his glasses up his nose and reaches into the tent for a blanket to drape over the two of them. As the blanket falls into place, Noctis grumbles and cuddles closer to Prompto, and Ignis can't help smiling. Perhaps he should let Prompto cook more often.


End file.
